Quote Of The Day: Advice For Those Emerging From The Closet
"I expect to have that conversation with my son in about twenty years where he goes, 'Dad, good news and bad news. Bad news: I'm gay. Good news: I'm a top.'"

Hey, it's something I guess. Show him who's boss, son.


Danny's Doppelganger
Danny: Do you know how close you were to working with Donny Most (of Happy Days fame) when you came back from vacation?
Adam: I thought you were Donny Most for the first four weeks. The red hair, you were well-spoken...
Teresa (to Adam, in disbelief): That's not Potsie?
Adam: It's Boozie, actually.


Ode To John Candy
"I was thinking last night... the idea that a big huge fat guy's last name was Candy...and then later on I was talking to someone about Bob Barker's love of dogs, and I thought, well for Christ's sake, his last name is BARKER, he speaks their language."

Teresa chimed in to say whenever she goes to therapy she sees another psychiatrist's placard on the door to a nearby office, Dr. Bitter. Danny says Gretchen's old gynocologist was named Dr. Goo.


Yet Another Live Commercial I Enjoyed
Maybe someone else will strongly relate as well--

"What was our obsession with the color avacado? The refrigerators, the washing machines... everything was avacado green in 1973. WRETCHED, baby!"


Recommended:
[1] Mr. Brightside-- Ahhh, seems like forever since they've done this, another one of my favorite bits. The premise? Instead of being his usual pessimistic self, Adam takes phone callers with problems and turns their frowns upside down. In this installment Sara is turning 30 and because of her fiancee's self-absorption is having to make her birthday plans herself, Chipper is divorcing from the only woman he's ever been with, and Rebecca's stepdad's debt to the I.R.S. is financially destroying her mother despite being divorced (Fun fact topping: Daddy incurred said debt BEFORE their marriage).

[2] News Segment 1-- Damn, I thought Alcoa really sponsored Definitely Not A Jew. Not that I thought they were aware their name was being used during that particular bit. Animals in Denver are getting the plague, hens are turning into whores. Why Adam will advise his daughter to have sex immediately with her dates.

[3] Bernard Hopkins-- So Rocky Balboa was crazy sci-fi, hmm? Here's a boxer about ten years younger and still competing with the best. The unheard of is getting louder and louder. One more generation to go and the elderly will inherit the earth.

[4] Jorge Garcia-- Lost fans, your favorite starving fat dude called in for an interview.